The Second Time Around
by Coraline Morgan
Summary: The Josef & Emma saga, part two. Six months after returning to Sydney, and unexpected phone call changes everything.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Moonlight or any of its characters. All credit goes to CBS and Moonlight.

Characters: Josef; Emma [original character]; Beth.

Rating: M Some coarse language; very high level sex scenes.

The Second Time Around.

Six months of tears had all but washed away the handwritten words on the paper. Yet it didn't matter, because the words were indelibly etched in my memory. How many times had I read the note? Dozens of times? A hundred times? Still, the memory stung as painfully as it had the very first time I had read Josef's note on that beautiful summer morning in LA.

Six months ago.

Half a world away.

_Another lifetime._

I had asked myself every single day since if Josef might have asked me to stay if I had not taken the Black Crystal; the party drug he had said had 'unearthed a less than charming side' to my personality. And he had been so right. Even so, Josef had been kind and generous; he had insisted on paying my hotel bill and even paid for my first-class ticket home to Sydney.

But in the end he had still let me go without hesitation.

I'm not stupid – well not completely anyway. I didn't want Josef to turn me. I knew that our relationship – such as it was – would never be exclusive. And that a vegan and a vampire was a match made in hell. Yet the heart has a will of its own, and I was very willing to settle for as much of Josef as he was willing to share with me.

But it seemed clear that Josef didn't want me at all.

Not that I could blame him after the way I behaved. Vampire or not, Josef was still a man and it was in his nature to enjoy what I had offered so freely – and without commitment. Consequently, the bitterest pill to swallow was that I had no-one to blame but myself.

My melancholy mood was just hitting rock bottom when the phone rang, jarring me back to the present.

How strange that such a brief telephone conversation could turn my whole world upside down in a matter of moments.

Josef Konstantin – the man who had seemingly consumed my every waking thought for the past six months – was travelling to Sydney on business and for some inexplicable reason I had just agreed to allow him to park his freezer in my small apartment for the duration of his stay. And with his usual arrogance, he had obviously expected my complete subservience to his will since he had already organised for the delivery to take place.

Fuming, I reached for the phone to call Beth. At least then I knew I would get some straight answers. Beth was extremely apologetic for giving Josef my address, but she reminded me how single minded Josef could be when he wanted something. And apparently in this case, the something that Josef wanted was to see me!

Over the next two days, my emotions ran the gamut from love to annoyance to anger to frustration and by the time I reached the airport, I was an emotional wreck trying very hard to appear cool, calm and collected.

Standing and watching the parade of tired passengers searching the crowd for loved ones or tour guides – or simply looking slightly bewildered – I was nervous of how I would react when I came face to face with Josef for the first time in six months. But when he finally appeared carrying his large suitcase my only feelings were those of concern. Josef looked ill – really ill. The trip had obviously been a difficult one. Yet he smiled warmly when he saw me, and walked slowly over and embraced me as though we had only seen each other the previous day. And in a lightning bolt epiphany, I realised how fast six months must seem to pass for a vampire of Josef's age; whereas for me each day without him had seemed to drag on forever.

My attention was jolted back to the present as Josef softly kissed my lips, then held me at arm's length and said, "Emma, it's so nice to see you again. I've missed you."

I heard the sincerity in his voice and so many emotions surged through me all at once; then laughter and tears formed a jamb in my throat. Speechless, I just looked into his eyes and finally forced out the words, "We really need to find a taxi and get you home!"

I left Josef standing in the shade while I found a taxi.

Once we were settled in the back seat, I took stock of Josef's condition. He looked pale and weak. I wondered how long it had been since he'd last had a drink or slept in a freezer. The drive would be at least a half-hour depending on the traffic and the competence of the taxi driver. So I made a snap decision. Quietly slipping out of my seat-belt, I sidled across the seat and pulled my hair away from my neck in an open invitation.

Josef's eyes hungrily focused on my throat but then he met my gaze and mouthed the word: _Here?_

I nodded.

Josef looked uncertain, so I leaned close and whispered, "Kiss me on the neck. Please!"

He reached up and placed one hand gently on my neck, then lowered his head until I felt two points of pressure against my throat. I steeled myself for the momentary pain, but this time felt only a euphoric rush.

Despite myself, I moaned with pleasure.

And the taxi driver said sharply, "Hey mate, this my taxi – not a hotel!"

Josef lovingly licked my neck and murmured, "Duly noted." Then he looked at me and mouthed the words: _Thank you, I do feel better now._

And I was gratified to see that some of the colour had returned to his face.

***

A good day's sleep in the freezer had done Josef the world of good, and he bounced back from the jetlag remarkably fast. He was so well, in fact, that he suggested that we spend the evening at the opera.

I checked my reflection in the mirror before presenting myself to Josef and I was pleased with the effect my brand new, emerald green evening gown created. It was not my usual style yet it was perfect for the opera. Ankle length – although sleeveless and backless – it still concealed more than it revealed however it had a sexy edge to it. I slipped on one of my black, elbow length gloves, but held the other in my hand as I walked into the living room.

Josef's smile when he saw me made the ludicrously expensive dress worth every cent.

He stood as I walked towards him but I motioned for hit to resume his seat on the sofa. I still wasn't sure about vampire etiquette, so I sat down next to him and simply offered him my exposed wrist and smiled.

"Emma, I can wait – really."

"But you must be hungry. And you won't enjoy the opera if all you can think about is having dinner."

Josef held my wrist gently and kissed my arm just below the elbow. Then I felt the sharpness of his fangs and the strange, exhilarating pleasure of his bite. It was over in a matter of moments and Josef gently wrapped a fine bandage around my wrist before helping me to put my glove on to cover the wound.

Then Josef ran his cool hand lightly up my arm all the way to my shoulder. His touch, as always, was electric. I looked into his eyes, and he caressed my face lightly before bringing his hand to rest on my neck. Then he leaned down – appearing to move almost in slow motion – and began to brush my neck with his lips. I threw my head back to allow him greater access and a low moan escaped from my throat unbidden. Josef's kisses became more intense as his hand drifted slowly down to caress my décolletage. My lips longed to meet Josef's lips and my breasts were aching for his touch, when he suddenly withdrew completely and said calmly, "Our limousine will be here in five minutes. Are you ready to leave?"

It took me a moment to comprehend what Josef had just said. I blinked at him stupidly and said, "Do you have any idea what you do to me, the way you touch me?"

The four-hundred year old vampire silently regarded me with a look of complete innocence stamped on his youthful features.

"Josef, you do know that torture is a criminal offense, don't you?" I asked quite seriously.

"Anticipation, my sweet Emma," he said, slowly smiling, "is half the fun."

***

Even though I had been to the Sydney Opera House more than once, I had never arrived in such style before. I had also never been escorted by such a handsome man before and I noticed the envious glances thrown my way by so many of the female patrons, and a few of the men too.

Once we were inside, Josef continued his solicitous attention to me. He brushed my hair back off my face, and lightly placed his hand on the small of my back as we walked through the lobby. After we were seated he leaned down to whisper in my ear and let his fingers skim my upper arm. He somehow even managed to accidently brush his muscular arm across one of my breasts. And his timing was exquisite. Every time that my heartbeat had almost returned to normal, he touched me again.

By the end of the performance, I had no idea what we had just witnessed. I doubt that I would have noticed if Pavarotti had taken the stage, because the entirety of my being was consumed by my desire for Josef.

On the way home in the limousine, Josef chatted happily about the calibre of the performance while all I could think about was getting back to my apartment and seducing Josef as quickly as possible.

As soon as we entered my apartment and I closed the door, I pressed Josef against the wall and kissed him passionately. I was grateful that he met my kiss with equal passion. Then he scooped me up in his arms and carried me straight to my bedroom. Within moments we had helped each other out of our formal clothes and were blissfully naked in each other's arms again.

Josef covered my face and neck with kisses and then slowly ran one hand from my knee up the inside of my thigh to my core.

I immediately parted my legs in an unmistakable invitation. I was aching to have Josef inside me and when he slid two fingers into my wetness I thought I was in paradise.

Josef ceased kissing me long enough to whisper, "You're ready for me then?"

"Josef I've been wet for hours and I think you already knew that!"

In one smooth movement, he embraced me, rolled us both over so he was lying on his back and supporting my weight with his hands on my hips, Josef gently entered me. It was as though the pain I had been feeling for the past six months was nothing but a bad dream I had finally woken from.

I had forgotten what a wonderful lover Josef was. His ability to give me pleasure was completely off the scale.

All of a sudden the cynical, self-protective part of my nature reared its ugly head and I sharply reminded myself to keep my emotions under control; after all, to Josef I was simply food, someone who could provide a place to park his freezer and a reasonably good fuck. _You are truly nothing more than that to him, Emma! _ I told myself sternly.

Abruptly, Josef stopped thrusting and gently lowered me down to support my own weight. I opened my eyes and met his gaze. His hands slowly and tenderly drifted up my arms to my shoulders and then down my back.

He smiled, yet I thought I saw a trace of sadness behind his eyes.

"Emma," he began softly, "I didn't thank you properly for allowing me to have a freezer installed here. The lack of a freezer was not an insurmountable problem but having one certainly makes my stay more pleasant." Josef put one cool hand behind my neck and pulled me down to meet his lips. His kiss was slow and deep and it made my head spin in the nicest possible way. He held me close as he ran the tips of his fingers up and down my spine. His gentle touch made it difficult to think. "I truly appreciate your willingness to feed me too, sweet Emma," he whispered in my ear and I smiled.

Josef resumed thrusting in a very slow rhythm and I closed my eyes.

When he spoke again, his voice was so quiet that I wasn't completely sure if his words were merely in my imagination. "And if you truly consider this to be _fucking_, then I'm insulted!"

My eyes sprung open. I sat up hastily and looked at Josef. He met my gaze but his expression was unreadable.

"Do I have _any_ secrets from you?" I asked.

Josef's only response was to smile slightly, lift me just above his hips again and begin to thrust powerfully, and the overwhelming pleasure immediately erased all conscious thought from my mind.

Just as I was teetering on the brink of an earth-shattering orgasm, Josef stopped dead.

"Why ... did ... you ... stop?" I managed to gasp.

"We need a change of location, I think."

"Why?" I moaned.

Josef smiled slightly, sat up and wrapped his strong arms around me. Then he shuffled forward and climbed off the bed, still holding me. I put my arms around his neck and wrapped my legs around his hips. He carried me easily into the bathroom and stepped into the shower. Before I could ask what he was planning, the shower was running steaming hot and my back was pressed against the cold, hard tiles.

The mix of sensations was overwhelming – cold, hard tiles at my back, Josef's cool, muscular body pressed against my front and hot water running over both of us. I wondered if we were safe but Josef murmured that he had good balance.

By then I didn't even question the fact that he has responded to my unspoken thought.

I simply accepted it.

Then out of the blue I recalled the last night I had spent in LA with Josef and my most appalling display in the men's room at the jazz club. Josef had taken me with my back to a tiled wall there, as well. I immediately stopped moaning and felt a chill, in spite of the hot water.

I suddenly felt sick to my stomach.

"Emma," Josef murmured, "Don't think about the past. Be here with me now – in this moment!" His lips found mine and I kissed him hungrily. Then – shocking both of us – I bit Josef on the shoulder. Fortunately he laughed. "I thought you're supposed to be a vegan!"

"I – I don't know what got into me-" I stammered. But Josef silenced me with another kiss.

I tried to shift my hold on Josef in order to caress his muscular back and almost lost my grip entirely. He quickly adjusted his stance and drove his cock even deeper into me. On the verge of orgasm again, I tilted my head and offered my neck to Josef.

And his timing was superb.

I felt the euphoric rush of his bite at the precise moment that I felt the overwhelming pulsations of my orgasm. Then everything went black.

I woke up to find myself in my bed, wrapped in a towel, with Josef lying next to me with a towel wrapped around his waist. He looked concerned.

I tried to make light of it by saying, "Wow, I didn't know I could pass out from too much pleasure!"

"I shouldn't have bitten you, Emma. Twice in one night was too much."

"Well if worst came to worst, you could have turned me!" I laughed.

Josef frowned at that. "It's not a joking matter! You could have been hurt!"

I reached out and touched Josef's face. "I'm alright – I trust you, Josef."

"Perhaps your trust is misplaced." Josef climbed easily off the bed and went to the window. He stood with his back to me. And without turning to face me, he spoke again. "Emma, why did you leave LA without saying good bye?"

My mouth went dry and the words caught in my throat. Even though I desperately wanted to confess the truth, that despite Beth's warning I had fallen in love with Josef and it had broken my heart when he didn't ask me to stay, all I heard myself say was: "I always hate saying goodbye's."

Josef turned then and looked me right in the eye. "Next time you speak to Beth, ask her what she threatened to do to me if I didn't let you go. I believe stakes and incinerators were mentioned."


	2. Chapter 2

The Second Time Around. Pt 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Moonlight or any of its characters. All credit goes to CBS and Moonlight.

Characters: Josef, Emma [original character], Beth.

Rating: M Drug references; some coarse language; very high level sex scenes.

Second Time Around. Part 2

Since Josef's arrival I Sydney, time had become an elastic concept for me, stretching and contracting without reason or warning. In some ways it felt as though I took my first breath when I saw Josef again in the airport – as if nothing in my life had any taste or texture or meaning until he was in my arms again – yet it also felt as though three days had passed in the space of a heartbeat.

_Three very weird and wonderful days. _

When a normal mortal visits Sydney for the first time, the list of places to go is pretty standard. The Sydney Harbour Bridge makes a spectacular climb for those with a head for heights; the Opera House is always a hit, even if only viewed from the outside; the botanical gardens and Taronga Park Zoo are popular with locals as well as tourists; plus there were countless museums, art galleries, restaurants and theatres. But I quickly realised that keeping a four-hundred year old vampire entertained presented unique problems. The climbing tour of the bridge only took place during the day; we had already been to the opera on Josef's first night in Sydney; the botanical gardens were lovely by night but a zoo seemed like a very bad place to take a vampire even if it had been a possibility. Even though Josef had never mentioned whether or not he liked animals, I assumed that they would naturally recognise and fear a vampire as an apex predator. And for a man who had witnessed so much of history first-hand, museums and art galleries seemed a little redundant.

Still, Josef he had insisted on taking me out to dinner every night despite my protestations. He had sat with me in some of the finest restaurants in Sydney and carefully explained to the courteous waiters exactly what I would and wouldn't eat before ordering the finest wine available. And he had been the perfect companion. Charming. Attentive. Amusing. He had me spellbound with his wisdom and philosophical views on life and the nature of humanity. He could talk intelligently on any subject I could name and I felt like a sponge soaking up all he had to teach me.

Later, we would spend blissful hours making love slowly, languorously, until my entire world began and ended in Josef's arms.

And yet I had been unable to completely escape from the uneasy knowledge that sooner or later I would have to speak to Beth.

Two full days and the best part of two nights had passed since Josef had revealed to me that Beth had interfered in our relationship. The fact that she had only the best of intentions didn't really matter. Good intentions certainly – _but the road to hell was paved with them after all. _

I had been keeping busy and making every excuse under the sun to avoid Beth's phone calls; a fact that obviously wasn't lost on Josef, even though so far he had been polite enough not to comment. Then, as if on cue, my phone buzzed for attention. I walked across the room to the table where I'd left it.

It was Beth – _again_.

I turned my phone off.

"You'll have to speak to her sooner or later."

Josef's presence right behind me made me jump despite myself. I had been so lost in thought I hadn't even noticed him enter the room. Muscular arms wrapped around my waist from behind. Soft lips caressed my neck. Then strong, cool hands slid down to my hips and turned me around. I looked up into Josef's handsome face but I couldn't read his expression. He placed both hands on my face and kissed me tenderly – I tasted blood on his lips.

A little disappointed, I pulled away from him.

"When I offered not long ago, you claimed you weren't hungry – have you gone off _vegan_ food Josef?" I asked, trying to hide my feelings of rejection behind a veil of humour. He had flatly refused to drink from me since the first night when I had fainted in the shower. In fact, once I had even caught him biting down on his own arm during the heat of passion, in preference to biting me. And even though I knew that Josef's only thought was to protect me from harm, it still felt strangely like a rebuff.

Too late, I caught my own thoughts and immediately tried to shift my focus to less intense issues. But Josef had read me like a book and apparently decided that the best way to express his feelings was through actions rather than words.

He picked me up and carried me past his freezer and into my bedroom. He kissed me hungrily while he unbuttoned my blouse and then slid it slowly off my shoulders, caressing my arms as he undressed me. Then his strong hands moved to the front of my jeans which he unzipped and I hurriedly pushed them downwards until I could kick my legs free of the confining denim. Suddenly, even my soft cotton underwear felt harsh against my skin in comparison to Josef's velvety touch and I struggled to free myself from my remaining clothing.

Josef still hadn't spoken a word and I missed his softly spoken expressions of affection. He pulled back from me momentarily and smiled then embraced me again and ran his tongue down my neck, pausing for a few seconds to linger over my pulsing jugular vein, before continuing his arousing journey across my collar bone, down to my left breast. I felt his cool lips surround my nipple and begin to suckle. I moaned then and began to unbutton his shirt but he immediately broke contact with me and just smiled and shook his head. Then he loosened his silk tie and gently fastened it over my eyes creating a very effective makeshift blindfold.

Despite the noise from the street my attention was so completely focused on Josef that I felt both blind and deaf – or at the very least blind and deaf to the _only_ sights and sounds I needed to experience. Then I felt myself being gently swept off my feet and tenderly laid down in the centre of my bed. The bed shifted beneath me and I realised that Josef had moved off it. Straining to hear the faintest sound, I detected the soft rustle of fabric being folded and felt the slightest movement of air as Josef crossed the room. Suddenly I felt movement on the bed again as Josef climbed in beside me.

I was acutely aware of his presence even though he wasn't touching me. Wearing the silk tie as a blindfold had served to heighten my senses in a similar way to the Black Crystal. Only this wasn't an artificial high – it was the naturally marvellous feeling that came from making love with the vampire I was in love with.

In this eternal moment, nothing else mattered.

I gasped as Josef's cool fingertips touched my neck. I reached out towards him but immediately felt my hands caught in a firm grip. His strong hand lifted both my hands above my head and held them there. Then the fingertips at my neck began to slowly trace sensuous patterns down to my cleavage. I rolled slightly in the hope that the fingertips would caress my nipples, but without breaking contact the hand shifted direction and began to stroke my arm from armpit to wrist and back again.

I moaned again, and then whispered, "_Please_!" My own voice sounded slightly hoarse and strange to my ears and I longed for Josef to speak, but he remained completely silent. Then I felt him roll towards me and I experienced the exquisite touch of his cool, hard body against mine. His erect cock pressed against my hip. I twisted my lower body so that I could throw one leg over Josef's legs but he instantly countered by putting one hand on my hip and gently pushing me onto my back.

He released his grip on my wrists and in the same movement, rolled partly on top of me. Our lips met in an almost chaste kiss and I felt the press of his fully extended fangs behind his lips. I wrapped my trembling arms around Josef's muscular back and pulled him closer. His skin felt silky-smooth and he smelled faintly of expensive aftershave. I felt the soft brush of lips against my neck and I revelled in the joyful anticipation of his bite – but his mouth continued its downward journey. I eased my legs slightly apart and felt Josef shift his weight until his knees rested on the bed between mine. Everywhere our skin touched an electric awareness flowed between us. Then I felt the slight roughness of his tongue against my erect nipple as it traced a pattern across my breast. The caressing tongue was withdrawn in favour of gentle kisses placed strategically down my abdomen towards the zenith of my desire. My hips began to undulate of their own accord even as my hands ran through Josef's silky hair. Finally I felt his tongue begin to explore my soft, secret places and ultimately circle and flick against my clit. I screamed his name, not caring if anyone may have heard.

I dug my fingers into his shoulders and said, "Please Josef, I want you inside of me now."

In the space of a heartbeat, his body covered mine. He grunted almost imperceptibly as he slowly entered me, filling me completely. I jerked my legs upwards and wrapped them around his hips allowing him even deeper penetration. Finally, he groaned and I was so grateful to hear Josef's voice since it had almost been like making love to a ghost. I started to remove my blindfold but he gently stopped me, so I returned to caressing his back while he slowly thrust deeply.

I was so wet that we both felt every inch of him smoothly gliding in and out of me.

I was incredibly close to an earth shattering orgasm, but I wanted – _needed_ – for Josef to bite me. I needed to feel the strange intimacy of our blood connection in order to be completely fulfilled.

Vulnerable – still blindfolded – I offered my neck in supplication. "_Josef_." I spoke his name as a plea.

I felt Josef shift his weight onto one arm as the other carefully slipped behind my back and lifted my upper body just above the bed. Then the sensation I had begged for – two points of pressure on my neck as I began to ride the waves of an undreamt of orgasm. The pleasure stopped time yet stretched into eternity. As I slowly became fully aware of my surroundings again, I realised that Josef was softly licking my neck.

I whispered, "I love you, Josef." Then immediately regretted my confession. Although I knew that he already knew, the words had not passed my lips until that moment. I steeled myself for his continuing silence, but instead, Josef whispered, "I love you too, Emma."

If I had died in that moment, I wouldn't have had any regrets at all. I had never felt such ecstatic contentment before in my entire life. Then Josef slowly rolled over pulling me with him as he moved.

As I lay on top of Josef, completely relaxed and fulfilled, he began to run his hands along my back from my shoulders to my butt. He gently caressed every inch with exquisite slowness as though committing every curve to memory. A soft moan escaped my lips and I felt my nipples stiffen against his smooth chest. I began to nuzzle and kiss Josef's neck and he responded by arching his neck slightly to allow me greater access.

He whispered, "Woman, you are insatiable."

I nodded and playfully bit the vampire on his neck, which brought forth an amused chuckle. I felt Josef's cock reacting to my kisses but he abruptly lifted me up and then moved to sit on the edge of the bed.

Surprised and hurt, I reached out and laid one hand on his back in an unspoken query.

Josef looked over his shoulder and said, "You haven't eaten tonight. What would you like?"

Confused, I responded. "I can grab a sandwich or there is fruit in the kitchen."

Josef nodded, then without looking at me, he said, "Please get dressed; I'd like to go for a walk. There is someone I need to tell you about."

I went numb. _So this was how he was going to end it._ I went through the motions of dressing like an automation. I needed to hear what Josef wanted to impart yet more than anything I wanted to return to bed and make love endlessly and pretend he had never spoken. But I heard my keys jingle in the living room and realised that Josef must have picked them up. I forced my legs to work, and when I confronted my lover he was smiling a little sadly and holding my phone in one hand.

"I've got your keys and your cell phone too, because you'll want to call Beth when you've heard what I have to say."

I nodded mutely.

The vampire selected an apple from the fruit bowl and held it up for my approval. I simply shrugged; the way my stomach felt in that moment, I doubted I'd ever want to eat again.

Josef extended his hand – which I took – and we walked towards the front door.

"Emma, about three decades before you were born, I met a young woman. Her name is Sarah..."

Josef's voice trailed off and I looked up into his face. I hadn't missed the fact the he had been careful to emphasise Sarah's name in the present tense; yet my heart broke anew when I saw the pain in his eyes.

Mindful of my neighbours, I quietly closed the door behind us and together we stepped into the night.


	3. Chapter 3

The Second Time Around pt 3.

Disclaimer: I do not own Moonlight or any of its characters; just borrowing them for a while. All credit goes to the rightful owners (whoever they are at the time of writing).

Characters: Josef, Emma [original character], Beth, Mick, Sarah.

Rating: M Some coarse language; very high level sex scenes.

_The Second Time Around pt 3. _

The view from my living room window is definitely not the iconic spectacle of the Sydney Harbour Bridge that so many Australian television shows seem determined to imply can be seen from almost every window in the greater Sydney area. In contrast, the main window in my apartment looks upon a most _unlovely_ panorama of a dilapidated brick wall complete with fretting mortar. And unfortunately, the mortar was not the only thing in the immediate vicinity that was fretting. I forced my gaze away from the brick wall with the aim of turning my attention back to my computer and the job at hand, (which was to finish writing a magazine article that was now very much overdue). But my eyes seemed to swivel of their own accord until my gaze settled upon Josef's freezer.

Once again I was consumed by a wave of loneliness so overwhelming that it physically hurt to breath. As I held my breath again momentarily I envied vampires their ability to avoid breathing altogether if suited them. And even more than that, I envied Josef his current state of frozen oblivion.

No dreams. No fear. No consciousness. No pain. Just frozen peacefulness while the young human woman whom he had proclaimed to love waited for the sun to finally set on this hot and endlessly bright summer day.

Abruptly I realised that time had been playing its elastic games again and a quick glance at my watch confirmed that it wasn't even midday. So seeking comfort in fantasy, I catapulted headlong into a daydream of an alternative existence where Josef had turned me, and rather than waiting for him to awaken I was sharing his freezer, sleeping in the shelter of his arms. Then reality hit again with a sledgehammer blow as I remembered the long, heart wrenching conversation Josef and I had had the previous night.

_Was it really only last night? Was it even possible to suffer so much anguish in such a short amount of time? _

Nothing in all my twenty-three years of existence had prepared me to deal with the news that the man – the vampire – who was the love of my young life, was waiting for the love of his _immortal_ life to awaken from the paranormal coma that had resulted from his failed attempt to turn her.

Josef had loved Sarah enough to turn her into a vampire – to attempt to keep her by his side for centuries – yet when I had playfully suggested that he could turn me, he had reacted in anger. But was that because he loved me enough to be afraid of losing me too, or because he was annoyed by my suggestion that I could be more to him than a casual fling? I didn't know and I was too scared of his answer to ask him directly. Although far from ideal, it was less painful to be in a state of uncertainty than to have Josef tell me outright that I was nothing more than the vampire version of a one-night-stand.

I rubbed my eyes and checked my watch again and tried to figure out what time it was in LA. I desperately needed to talk to someone who understood the unique complexities of the problems that a human / vampire relationship presented – which basically meant that I could call either Beth or Mick. However, Beth would probably be getting ready for bed and even though Mick was Josef's closest friend and he had been perfectly charming (in his own, taciturn way), the reality was that Mick and I were barely acquainted. So I paced around my small apartment for a few minutes and then decided to call Beth despite the lateness of the hour.

My call went straight to her voicemail.

_Perhaps that was a little sign from the universe to say: Emma, you are a grown woman and you have to make your own decisions! _

Although I tried to force myself to concentrate on my work, I could barely even manage to spell simple words correctly, never mind actually putting an eloquent sentence together. So after a half-hour of staring at the mockingly blank page on the computer screen, I stood up and grabbed my keys and headed towards the door. But then I was faced with the issue of whether or not it was safe to leave Josef asleep – when he was as _comparatively_ vulnerable as a vampire can be – in my apartment while I went for a walk to clear my head. My mind suddenly filled with images of worst-case-scenarios that bordered on complete paranoia; a fire in my apartment building or thieves breaking in and finding Josef asleep in the freezer then calling the police thinking I had a dead body in my living room. So I reluctantly tossed my keys back onto the kitchen bench and returned to staring at the neighbouring brick wall.

My eyes seemed to lose focus as my attention turned inwards. I felt my eyelids close of their own accord as my memory flooded with all the sensations of touch and smell that had formed my experience of lovemaking with Josef the night before, when he had used his silk tie to blindfold me. He did love me – I knew that. But the lingering question that nonetheless haunted my mind was: _am I just an amusing fling to him?_ And yet I couldn't shake the strong impression that Josef had actually got more than he had bargained for with me. He was a handsome, powerful, influential, extremely wealthy vampire so he had absolutely nothing to gain by proclaiming his love for me if there was no truth behind his softly spoken words. Even though I had been the first one to utter the words 'I love you' as I lay completely satiated in his arms, Josef was not the kind of man to feel himself under any obligation to say those words back if he didn't feel it. Nevertheless, he had chosen only moments later to pull away from me and take me out into the night and tell me all about Sarah.

What he hadn't told me was where that left me in his life.

_Did I even have a place in Josef's world at all?_

"Get a fucking grip, Emma!" I ordered myself.

Noticing the change in the light, I glanced at my watch and found it was late afternoon. _Wow!_ _Time really can fly when you're staring into space!_ Out of the blue a shower seemed like a good idea, even though I had showered at dawn, just after Josef had retired to his freezer for the day. I decided to shower and wash my hair so I'd be ready for dinner when Josef rose, (since no doubt he would have his breakfast and then take me out to a fine restaurant). Strangely enough, I had easily accepted that my refrigerator was well stocked with human blood, and although it was disturbing to my vegan sensibilities, it was a necessary compromise. The whole situation of having a vampire for a houseguest was surreal yet it was also one that I never wanted to end. Still, I cautioned myself to keep my focus on the present as I walked into my bedroom and stripped out of my sweaty clothes, before wandering into the adjoining bathroom.

The cool water washing over my skin felt heavenly after the heat of the day. I let the water thoroughly soak my thick hair before I reached for the shampoo and began to work my hair into a rich lather. I loved the sandalwood scent and hoped that Josef would enjoy it too. With his vampiric sense of smell, I had wondered if perfume was overwhelming to him, but then again he wore a subtle aftershave that drove me to distraction. And the only time he had drawn attention to his sense of smell was the night in LA when he had said that he found the scent of our lovemaking intoxicating.

I was so lost in memories and the sensuous feeling of the water against my skin and the subtle spicy perfume of my shampoo that I jumped when I felt Josef's strong hands begin to massage my scalp. My eyes sprung open and I immediately wished that they hadn't because the shampoo stung my eyes painfully.

I dipped my face beneath the shower spray until the worst of the stinging subsided, then – spluttering slightly – I turned to face Josef.

"Are you alright?" He softly enquired.

Without a word, I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him hungrily. His mouth had the faintly metallic taste of blood so I knew he had drunk his breakfast before coming to find me. I pressed my breasts against Josef's hard chest and then moved my hips forward until I felt his erection press into my abdomen. My hands slid all over his muscular form, gliding easily with the aid of the water, and I moved my mouth to Josef's throat. He arched his neck, clearly enjoying my kisses. I moaned and began to roll my hips against his upper thigh but he gently took hold of my shoulders and then unexpectedly moved me away from himself and held me at arm's length. Confused, I pointedly looked down at his throbbing cock and then back up to his face.

"Yes, I am pleased to see you too, Emma," he commented. "Even though you are an impatient minx." Then he reached for the shower gel and poured an extravagant amount into his hands and worked the gel into a rich lather. Any thoughts of protest left my mind as Josef began to wash me. He kissed me passionately while he wrapped his arms around me and washed my back from my neck all the way down to my butt. Then he pulled away from me and turned me around. He pulled me back against himself as he caressed my breasts and stomach before he ran his hands down both my arms.

"Turn around, Emma."

I did as instructed and Josef backed me against the cold tiles. Next he reached down and took a firm hold of my left leg and slowly washed me from ankle to upper thigh; then he repeated the process with my right leg. Only this time, when he released my leg I grabbed his hand and pressed it between my thighs while my other hand reached out for his cock.

"Woman you are incorrigible," Josef laughed as he slid two fingers into my throbbing wetness. I threw one arm around his neck and struggled to stay standing as I came almost immediately. With obvious self-control, Josef turned his face well away from my willingly exposed neck. I felt his cock twitch in my hand as his seed spilled over my stomach and he sunk his fangs into his own forearm even as he pressed his hips hard into me.

After that he gently and lovingly re-washed my stomach before I returned the compliment and had the amazingly pleasurable experience of bathing Josef from head to toe. His body was hard and muscular and his smooth skin was cool to the touch. It was almost like washing a marble statue of an ancient god – except that Josef was flesh and blood and he responded to my gentle ministrations by groaning and shuddering beneath my hands.

The whole vampire issue notwithstanding, I had never met a man like Josef before in my life. I had only been in two relationships previously and I had never felt about either boyfriend the way I was feeling now. I was so much in love with Josef I had no idea how I could go on living without him once he left me – and for the first time in my life, I understood the real meaning of the phrase '_madly_ in love'.

Too late, I realised that Josef had 'heard' my every thought as clearly as if I had spoken aloud. He stiffened slightly but then took my hand in his and we stepped out of the shower together.

"How about a massage?" Josef's voice was soft.

"Are you asking for one or offering one?"

"_Both_." Josef went and stretched out on my bed face down.

In his sleekness he reminded me of a magnificent and dangerous cat.

I climbed onto the bed alongside of him. The weather was too hot to use massage oil but his skin was still wet from the shower anyway, which provided just enough 'slip' for comfort. I began at Josef's broad shoulders and worked my way down to his slim hips. I was about to suggest that he roll over onto his back when he got out of bed and silently padded into the kitchen. Assuming that he was hungry I stretched out on my side and waited for him to return, but to my surprise he returned a few minutes later with a dinner plate overflowing with sliced fruit and a small bowl of rice malt syrup.

I smiled and sat up. "What's all this, Josef?"

He dipped a slice of apple into the rice malt syrup and held it out for me to sample.

"You'll need to keep your energy up for what I have in mind."

"Please – do tell." I smiled.

"Actions speak louder than words, Emma. Haven't I taught you that yet?"

When I opened my mouth to respond, Josef placed a mandarin segment in my mouth so I took the hint and decided to concentrate on enjoying my dinner without another word.

But Josef suddenly decided that he wanted to play twenty-questions.

Firstly he asked how long I'd been a vegan and why I had become one in the first place – whether it was an issue of health or ethics or both? He listened intently to everything I said; and, I suspect, to a lot that I didn't say too. He paused in his interrogation for a few minutes and continued to feed me the fruit, before quickly asking me if I looked down on him for being a vampire. He didn't elaborate on whether or not he was given a choice in the matter and I didn't want to pry; I believed that he would tell me if he thought it was important. I took the opportunity to assure him that once I'd recovered from my initial shock – and disbelief – that I was fine with it. I understood that for Josef, being a vampire is simply another aspect of his fundamental nature. He laughed at my words and said it was very New Age of me to say that. In return I just smiled and shrugged. But what Josef did and said next left me completely speechless. He laid me back on the bed and then lay down next to me with his head propped up on one elbow. He reached out with one hand and began to stroke my throat and my face and then my breasts before moving his hand down to my stomach. My eyes closed even as my lips parted and I moaned softly at his touch. Then he whispered that I was so beautiful and that he could preserve my beauty forever. I was so lost in the pleasure of his caresses that I didn't comprehend what he was actually alluding to until he asked if I could live with my conscience – as a vampire – providing that I only ever drank the blood of _willing_ human donors.

My mind went completely blank with the shock of Josef's question, and he murmured that I didn't have to answer him immediately – but that he _would_ prefer an answer before dawn.

The only semi-coherent thought that I could manage to formulate was that it would be safer if I kept Josef well away from my throat, at least for the time being. So I pushed him onto his back and climbed astride him. He smiled and assisted me by holding his rock-hard cock at the appropriate angle as I eased myself onto him. I put both hands on his chest to steady myself as he began to stroke my thighs. Then he slid his hands up my arms and gently pulled me down towards him.

Yet for a moment apprehension overtook me and I resisted his encouragement.

"Emma, I only want to kiss you. If I actually intended to hurt you ... well ... you wouldn't stand a chance anyway. _You know that_."

_Oh yes, I was all too well aware of that fact. Still, I trusted Josef – quite literally – with my life. _

So I lay down until I felt the delightful press of my full breasts against Josef's hard, cool chest and his lips found mine. As always, his kisses wiped every thought from my mind. And we stayed like that for a long time until the throbbing at my core finally demanded release. With his usual exquisite timing Josef carefully rolled me onto my back and I wrapped my legs around his waist as he thrust into me. Moments later, he stopped and lifted my legs over his shoulders allowing him the deepest possible penetration. As he slowly stroked in and out I thought I was in genuine danger of dying from sheer pleasure.

When at last I tried to speak, my words emerged in broken gasps between moans.

"Oh my god ... Josef ... faster ... _please_ ... I can't bear it ... please ... _don't stop_."

And my beautiful, beloved vampire took me to a place of pure ecstasy before he found his own release seconds later.

He eased my legs off his shoulders and I slowly lowered them so that we were both more comfortable. Then as Josef brushed my damp hair from my forehead, I noticed that his wrist hadn't completely healed from his obviously recent bite and I quickly grabbed his hand and licked his wrist. Even as I did it I knew it was stupid but if Josef wanted an answer to his question about turning me I needed to know how it would feel to drink blood. And on a deeper level, I knew that I was also seeking the feral connection I felt whenever Josef bit me.

Yet the taste of his blood was almost as big a shock as the instantaneous rush I experienced.

Josef jerked his hand away and said, "Don't _ever_ do that again. It's too dangerous!"

I tried to read his expression but unfortunately I couldn't see into Josef's soul as he could so obviously see into mine. I felt my eyes fill with tears and I squeezed them shut.

"Emma, the thought of losing you feels like a stake in my heart."

Josef covered my face and throat with kisses and we passed the rest of the night in each other's arms, making love over and over again. As the first rays of dawn crept into my apartment, Josef's cell phone rang. His conversation was brief and business like and apparently what he considered to be good news.

"Emma, I'm cutting my trip a little short and I'll be leaving tomorrow night," he announced with a smile.

Stunned, the only thing I could think of to say was, "What about your freezer?"

He laughed and said, "That's all taken care of. I've taken care of everything. Is your passport current?"

_So he's taken care of everything? He's just going home to LA as if I don't matter? Wait a minute – did he just ask if my passport is current? _

"Yes, I just asked if your passport is up to date because I'd really like us to catch the same flight."

When I eventually found my voice, I spoke slowly. "Josef, are you asking me to go back to the States with you? For how long?"

He took me in his arms. "For as long as you like, Emma. Your Green Card is organised. I've also paid the rent on this apartment for a couple of years to give you a sense of security – so you know you have a home to return to should you wish to do so – but since you work freelance, it really doesn't matter where you live anyway. In LA you'll live with me, obviously. I'll buy you a car when we get home and I'll set up an office for you if you like –"

"Now wait just a minute, Josef!" I interjected. "You are taking an awful lot for granted here."

"I'm just taking charge, Emma," Josef explained as he graced me with a smile that made my heart melt. "_I thought you liked that about me_."

I stared at him mutely. While it was true that I didn't want to even begin contemplate life without Josef, the decision to simply pack up my life and move to LA – even temporarily – was not one I could make on a whim. Particularly after all the shocks of the last twenty-four hours! First Josef had told me about Sarah; then he had brought up the idea of turning me; and now he apparently expected me to be overwhelmed with gratitude and excitement at the thought of leaving my family and friends behind and moving to the United States with less than two days notice.

As much as I loved Josef, I couldn't – and wouldn't – make such a major decision instantaneously.

He looked surprised and disappointed by my ambivalence.

"Well, Emma, you have a lot to think about so I'm going to get an early morning and let you get some sleep, too." And without another word, he went to his freezer.

I fell back onto my bed. For the second time in two days, Josef had left me with far too much to contemplate before retreating to his freezer. Apparently when push came to shove, even a four-hundred year-old vampire is still an emotionally stunted creature at the core. _Did men simply stop growing emotionally around the age of twelve? _I made a mental note to ask Beth about Mick the next time I spoke to her. Looking at Mick I would have guessed that he must have been about thirty-years-old at the time he was turned and he at least appeared to be emotionally mature. Then again, with men – vampire or human – it was hard to tell at a glance.

I closed my eyes and tried to will myself to sleep. Eventually I managed to get a couple of fitful hours of rest but then I had to get up and at least make an attempt to get some work done. By midafternoon I had actually written the bare bones of an article – and while it wasn't Pulitzer Prize material it was better than nothing. Still, the idea that I couldn't leave Sydney in the company of a man my parents hadn't even met kept interfering with every other train of thought I had, so I phoned Mum and asked her if she and Dad were free for dinner. She sounded cautiously happy at the idea of meeting the man who had had me in a blue-funk for the past six months and accepted the invitation.

I just hoped that Josef would be amenable to meeting my parents.

Josef woke relatively early in the afternoon and when I told him that I'd invited my parents to dinner, he simply changed the reservation to a table for four and showed no other reaction. I decided to wear the same emerald green gown that I'd worn to the opera, even though it was a little much – and Josef wore his usual immaculate suit, complete with the same silk tie he had used to blindfold me.

As soon as I saw him, both my heart and my mind began to race.

"Fancy a bite before we leave?" I asked with a smile.

Josef looked hungrily at my proffered wrist but said, "Much as I appreciate your hospitality, I have plenty for breakfast in the fridge."

"Oh, I think we can do better than that – sit down."

Josef sat on the sofa and observed me with a bemused smile. I slowly got down on my knees in front of him and then began to loosen his tie. He reached for my neck and then slid his hands into my hair. I moaned a little at his cool touch as I unbuttoned his shirt. Then I leaned forward and started to kiss his chest even as I undid his trousers. Josef's hands moved to slowly caress my bare back and arms, making me tremble. Finally, I freed his cock as much as I could in the slightly awkward position we were in, and took his shaft into my right hand. Because the whole point of the encounter was really more about enhancing Josef's dinner than it was about sex, I simply ran the tip of my tongue around the head of his cock several times before taking him into my mouth and sucking firmly. He responded by reaching for my left hand and moments later – as I swallowed – I once again felt the strange rapture of his bite. Then Josef licked my wrist tenderly to assist the healing process and helped me to my feet. I went into the kitchen to apply two tiny adhesive dressings to the puncture wounds, since the gloves I'd worn to the I opera – that had so effectively hidden the bandage – were not appropriate for the restaurant.

Suddenly Josef swept me off my feet and I laughed as he carried me into my bedroom.

"We don't have time ..." I whispered reluctantly, all the while hoping he would ignore my protestations. And he did.

Josef simply smiled at me and pushed my velvet gown up my thighs. I made an attempt to remove my stiletto heels but he told me to leave them on. Then he grasped my panties in his teeth and pulled them down and off. We didn't have time for the usual leisurely foreplay, but I didn't need it anyway. Josef kissed his way up the inside of my right thigh while matching the caress on my left thigh with his fingertips. I moved my legs further apart a little cautiously, wary of either breaking the heels off my shoes or ripping the bed sheets. But one of the upsides of having a vampire for a lover was the knowledge that even if I did accidently hurt him, he would – at least – heal quickly.

As soon as Josef's tongue found my centre time stopped for me. It was the most delicate torment imaginable. He played me like a master musician bringing forth shades and subtleties in the music that even the composer couldn't have imagined.

As if from a distance, I heard myself cry out, "Josef!" And then I slipped into a state of dreamlike semi-awareness. I felt Josef place one last kiss gently on my nether lips and then I became aware that he was pulling my panties back up and pulling my evening gown back down over my legs.

"Unfortunately Emma, we really do need to go now or we'll miss our reservation."

I don't know if it was the after-effects of feeding Josef or the intensity of my orgasm or a combination of the two, but my dreamlike state persisted throughout dinner.

I was aware that my father had joked to Josef that I was cheap to keep because I lived on rabbit food and I noticed my mother repeatedly fussing about Josef's lack of appetite when the food was so wonderful. Still, my father was clearly impressed with Josef's business acumen and my mother commented to me quietly as we were leaving that Josef was very handsome. Not unlike my father as a young man, she had said, and I had almost blurted out that Josef was most definitely not a young man. But by far the most embarrassing occurrence was my parents' insistence on calling me by my childhood pet name – Emmy – all night. Then again, considering that I had just introduced my parents to my lover, (who also happened to be an ancient vampire), I decided that on balance the evening had gone wonderfully well.

As Josef and I walked into my apartment, he said, "Well, Emmy, aren't you just the apple of your parents eyes?"

I felt myself blush and I saw a fleeting glimpse of predatory appreciation cross Josef's handsome features, then seconds later he was my Josef again. "What can I say? They're my parents and they love me!"

"As do I, Emma."

In the space of a heartbeat, Josef was standing in front of me and then I was in his arms and we were continuing what we had started before dinner. We made love until I was exhausted and I fell asleep being cradled in his arms. Later – while it was still dark – I woke to find him gone (along with my keys) and a note on the table that simply read: 'Don't worry – I'll be back well before dawn. Josef.'

I went back to bed and when I woke in the morning, I found Josef already in his freezer.

I paced my apartment for over an hour, questioning the good sense of the decision I was in the process of making. The reality that I was so loathe to face was that I barely knew Josef; nor did I have more than the faintest understanding of his vampire lifestyle. I believed that Josef and Mick were both decent people but what of the rest of their community? And Josef had carefully avoided the question of what would happen if (or when) Sarah emerged from her coma. Yet no relationship came with a guarantee. The best anyone – mortal or immortal – could do was to try their hardest and hope for the best. Complicating the issue exponentially, Josef's question about turning me into a vampire kept coming to mind. Finally I decided that I simply needed to make the determination about whether or not I would move to LA.

Everything else would just have to wait.

Somehow my body seemed to make the choice that my mind was unwilling to take responsibility for and I found myself busy for the next few hours packing up my entire life, getting ready to move to LA to live with a four-hundred year old vampire!

Even as I packed my suitcases I kept expecting my alarm clock to blare at any moment and jar me back to reality. Instead, the only disruption to my efforts came when Josef woke up and began wandering around my apartment, complaining about the heat and how tired he was, while simultaneously offering his strong views about was and wasn't worth taking to LA, (and his opinion of my possessions – some of which held great sentimental value – wasn't particularly flattering.) Still, when my stress levels were getting hard to cope with, Josef managed to make me laugh as he told me that because he was so pleased that I was going with him, he had decided not to kill a certain obnoxious Australian immigration official after all. I eventually, (reluctantly), acknowledged to myself that Josef hadn't smiled once when he'd spoken about the immigration officer and that made me wonder if he actually had been making a joke. _Could he really be capable of murder?_ But I reassured myself with the thought that even though Josef was a vampire he was always gentle with me and that I probably just didn't quite understand his sense of humour yet. And even though the whole situation reminded me painfully of just how little I really knew about Josef, I consoled myself with the thought that it was simply a part of the getting-to-know-each-other process.

Finally, after I had packed all my essential clothes and personal items and copied my computer files to CD, Josef reassured me that the rest of my belongings would be collected and shipped to LA promptly. I thanked him – and burst into tears. He swept me up in his arms and carried me to my bed for the last time. He held me and soothed me until I regained some self-control and then he suggested that I call my friends and ask them to come to the airport. So I spent the best part of an hour making calls to shocked friends and family. Some openly expressed the idea that I'd lost my mind but most people were (thankfully) supportive.

Then Josef announced that it was time for us to leave.

I took one last bittersweet look around my apartment and then closed the door and walked towards my nebulous future in LA.

The only thing I was completely sure of was my love for Josef – and his for me.

But that was enough.

The end.


End file.
